I would never consider myself an unhappy person. Not by any means. But we all get stuck in ruts here and there. Last year (or maybe two years at this point), I was definitely in one of those ruts. I felt stuck. Like I wasn’t where I was supposed to be in life. It felt as though I was putting in all this effort, but nothing was really progressing.
I have a tendency to always focus on the future. So when I felt stuck and “unhappy” in my current situation it was hard for me to come out of it. I could picture my future, what I wanted out of it, but I just could not get there.
This was when I really started to get into self-help books and, eventually, podcasts. I heard an interview with Brooke Castillo on a podcast I had been listening to and quickly jumped over to her podcast, The Life Coach School Podcast. When I find a new podcast I like to start from the beginning and as I listened to each episode I was more and more intrigued with Castillo’s teaching. However it wasn’t until I got to episode 9 that I was really sold.
“It Doesn’t Get Better Than This”
“It Doesn’t Get Better Than This” is the title of that episode from The Life Coach School Podcast and when I first heard it, my mind had been blown (for lack of a better phrase). I have now listened to this episode a good 5 or 6 times. Usually whenever I am in need of a mental check or a reminder to stay focused.
Maybe the information on this episode of The Life Coach School Podcast is common knowledge to some people and while it is obvious, it was (is) so empowering to hear. I’ve told pretty much everyone I know to listen to this episode and I really wanted to share it with all of you as well. Just incase you are maybe stuck in one of those ruts. But even if your not, I promise you, you will take something from this episode. Below is a round-up of some of the major points/lessons I learned listening to this episode.
“Being aware of the present moment simply means you never believe the illusion that the future is going to be better than what is going on right now”
This was a quote from a book Brooke Castillo was reading, but it is the premise of the entire episode. By itself the quote is extremely eye opening and it really does make you think. Castillo breaks down this quote throughout the entire episode which only makes it all the more epic.
“Our capacity for happiness has nothing to do with what is going on externally. Joy and happiness come from what is going on in our mind.”
This was really the “ah-ha” moment for me. The idea that we completely control how happy we are simply by controlling our thoughts. It is such a simple concept. One, I feel, we should all be aware of. However no one ever informed me of this. So hearing it for the first time just cleared up so many things for me.
“Planning for the future moment doesn’t mean that it will be better than this moment.”
Meaning we can and should plan for our future. However we shouldn’t be planning it with the idea that it is going to be better than what we have now. Castillo brings up how we are often trading our current moment for some future moment. A future moment that we believe will be better. If that isn’t the truth, I don’t know what is. That was always a major issue for me. I always believed that the future I have envisioned for myself was going to be so much better than where I am at now. Since listening to this episode though, I’ve been able to really change my mindset on that. When I do feel myself looking toward the future, I remind myself of where I’m at now. I think of what I have to be grateful for now and I remember that the now is really all I have.
“Your capacity for joy is the exact same right this minute as it is when you’ve lost 10 lbs. Know that the reason you believe you’ll be happier is because you’ll be thinner, but that is not true. The reason you are happier when you are thinner is because you give yourself permission to be happier.”
So Castillo was originally a weight loss coach hence the example. This just goes back to planning for the future. We can just as easily be as happy now, where we are currently at, than we can be in the future we have envisioned. We don’t need that future in order to be happy.
“I am in the present moment when I am planning for my future. I don’t trade this moment or believe that this moment is less valuable based on the goals I have in my future.”
Hearing all of this really shook me. It made me realize that dwelling on my current situation while believing that my future would be so much better, would ultimately get me nowhere. This episode of The Life Coach School Podcast completely changed my perspective and I am a much better person because of it. Of course, I still have goals I want to reach and dreams I want to make reality, but I don’t feel stuck anymore. I am grateful for where I am. I am fully aware just how much I am in control of my own happiness with what I choose to believe. And that is a game changer.